ooh la la lady

Ugly-hot.  This morning, I woke up with the strange phenomenon of ugly-hotness on the mind.  People whose faces just don’t quite make sense, but you like the confusion.  The muddled features beckon you to stare at them in all of their strange-skin-fold wonder.  You ask yourself, “Why is that crease there?” or “That mustache is revolting… why do I want to touch it?”

I am drawn to ugly-hot celebs.  I guess I’d be drawn to ugly-hot people, too, if I saw them more often in my day-to-day existence.  But the truth of the matter is, ugly-hot is a pretty rare gift.  It’s way more common to see someone who is just normal hot, like Megan Fox or Robert Pattinson.  And, of course, we all see normal ugly folks walking around, too.  That’s really where the shame is, when strangely-shaped or bizarre features aren’t at least interesting in toto. 

Today, I will be posting pictures of my favorite ugly-hot people.  Enjoy. 

xoxo,

O

good morning, world. 

today, i am giving a guest lecture at a community college on stem cell policy.  being that you probably don’t know me, and even if you do, you may be asking, “what gives O the right to get in front of a classroom and talk about stem cells?”  well, let me just say, this is another perfect example of the world throwing something at you that you have no business doing, and you saying yes and doing it anyways! 

i used to teach high school before my current profession, and let me tell you, i am just ITCHING to make a hand-out for this guest lecture.  something hand-drawn and obnoxious, and oh yes, it will be a partner activity!  at first, i felt mildly guilty about this. after all, maybe these community college students are full-on adults who will resent my lesson plan as childish, juvenile, and utterly beneath them!  then, the urge to draw stem cells with smiley faces overcame me, and i threw all caution for their potential maturity to the wind. 

lucky for them, my stem cells came out looking like happy sperm, so i guess i’ll take that as a sign to stick to a more professional presentation.  but dammit, they’re still doing a partner activity!

-O

so last night, i dreamt about john goodman.  i mean, i dreamt about him.  it was probably a result of my late-night DVR session with the HBO show Treme, but still.  we made out, and it was nice.  this leads me to wonder what my subconscious is really after him for—is it the husky voice, the sardonic wit, the never-ending flow of obscenities…. or do i have some weird Roseanne envy that i should confront in therapy?  never mind the fact that the best i can do while my boy is out of town is a make-out session with mssr. john goodman.  

tonight i’m watching planet earth.  that should be safe, right?  

this dream made me ponder all of the dreams (you get what the italics stand for, i gather) i’ve had over the years, and the leading men that star in the movies behind my eyelids.  my very first starred Bono.  what. Bono.  all it consisted of was me waking up in a tilted bed and seeing Bono smiling at me through a tilted window.  it was the most graphically innocent dream i’ve ever had.  i guess i haven’t progressed much on that front.  

maybe tonight will be better.  

-O

this is a blog about all of the completely improper things i think about on a minute-by-minute basis.  follow at your own risk!